If an experience of a church wounded you then you probably qualify!
Fortunately, we live in an age that is more open and less in denial to the reality of spiritual abuse. Sadly, many people have had harsh or abusive words said to them by Priests/pastors… not exactly a portrayal of Christ! In most peoples' view Jesus sided with the emotionally broken person, and extended both healing and compassionate guidance.
So what exactly are you left with? Distorted images of God and:
• SHAME
• RESENTMENT
• SPIRITUAL ALIENATION
• MEANINGLESSNESS
• LONGING FOR SOME KIND OF LOVING GOD
All of the above affect those who are trying to recover from drugs/alcohol… and everyone else too! Many therapists face the challenge of tending to wounded souls… Psychotherapy roughly translated means: ‘care of the soul’.
But, I suspect most therapists struggle with ‘spiritual abuse’ as an issue in therapy. Especially if the client desires to continue their Christian journey.
In my experience it is an amazing liberation for people to work-thru their spiritual wounds.
Protestant-Evangelical Churches are not exempt from the above! Punitive, controlling, perfectionistic images of ‘God’ abound in those who have been hurt by negative elements in these churches.
I do want to emphasize that most people attending churches have a very good experience of church, and find worship extremely helpful and healing.
I am a former Catholic monk and continue to assist those who want to heal and continue their Christian journey and those who feel betrayed by the church and need to find other spiritual practices.
Suggested reading: Care of the soul or Dark nights of the soul.
Let me know if you are a recovering Christian… all sincere comments welcome.
Peace,
Brian
e. http://www.innercare.org/
p. 1-604-746-1164
Dear Brian: After a 31 year abusive marriage, I got a divorce and then my church (of 31 years) voted me out of membership, with my name up on a big screen, followed by the words: "Conduct Unbecoming a Child of God." I fought the system for 18 months to try and stop the pastor from counseling any more women, because 2 of his counselees.....were suicidal.
ReplyDeleteAs usual in my life of abuse, I was able to make something positive come from the spiritual abuse debacle: www.churchabusepoetrytherapy.com...over 17,619 hits so far. I haven't been to a church in 7 years; I have tried but it is too painful. Thank you for hearing my story. I'd love to hear your thoughts: wacalice@aol.com
Kind Regards, Alice (over comer and wounded healer)
Hi,
ReplyDeleteSorry not to reply asap... just re-located my family and retreat center and have been ultra busy.
I have seen so much of this kind of 'soul wound'.... it is all to common and almost always goes unhealed... many simply reject both God and the church... I'd see them as victims of dysfunctional church sin and therefore not culpable in any way.
I'm very very glad that you have overcome your experience and have aligned yourself with others.
There 'tends' to be less of this in the bigger/more established mainstream churches... but, it happens there too!
The term 'spiritual abuse' was only acknowledged in the last two decades and there is still a good deal of ignorance about this critical issue!
I am happy to keep up any email contact...if that would be helpful.
Peace,
Brian